What a whirlwind of a week I have had! Things are getting tough again, but I guess it really is in the eye of the beholder, right?

My mom's boyfriend lost his job on Monday. I am not sure exactly how we are going to pull this off, but I am trying to keep a positive attitude and know that it will work out how it is supposed to. I have no control over it and all I can do is my best. I still have no clue when I will begin working full time again. I went to speak to my boss about it this morning and he had already left the building.

I got some kind of random throat thing, I am not sure if it is Tonsillitis or Strep, but it is ugly! A family member gave me some left-over penicillin and I took all of that in hopes that it will help. This morning when I checked my throat it seems to look a little better.

I decided yesterday in the middle of a stress attack that I needed to drop a class. I hadn't even attended the class yet, but with all of the other stuff I have going on I felt overwhelmed already. That is no way to begin a quarter, and I didn't want to start off on a negative note, so I am going to take the class next quarter. I also decided to push my internship back by a quarter (which pushes graduation back, too) because I am not going to try and fight and stress myself out. I am really seeing an impact on my health with all the stressing I do, and I want to make an effort to change that.

My little girl is going to be 2 in three days! I cannot believe how fast time has gone by! I think she is the most amazing thing ever! She has this amazing personality blooming more and more everyday and it blows me away! She will randomly start laughing at things that are just mundane to me, but crazy funny to her. Yesterday I was trying to pop my wrist so I was moving it all around and she thought that was the silliest thing! She was cracking up and said "you funny momma." How cute! :o) I love her.

Random

Last night I took Kyleigh to a sleep over at my cousin's house. She had 7 kids there all in the age range of 1-8. It was crazy to say the least, but it was also cute to see the dynamic between the kids. They all chased each other around the house and played. Kyleigh was the second youngest, and the older kids were so good with her. They helped her play and she cautiously followed them around watching what they were doing. She had a blast and it really made me realize what a big girl she is getting to be. In less than a month she will be a whopping 2 years old! I can't believe it!! My how time flies when you are having fun!

I got to visit with my new niece (cousin) Brooklyn two nights ago and she is the cutest little thing! She actually looks a bit like Kyleigh when she was her age. I was feeding her a bottle of milk and asking her Momma if shes pooped on her yet, and what do you know, she poops on me! I just laughed, it was like her punishment for me warning her Momma about it! Even that was cute! I am so proud of my cousin, she is doing so great as a first time Momma and her husband is amazing too. Their love is so wonderful to me, and I hope that they never take it for granted.

Tuesday marks the beginning of a new quarter at school, and it should be a crazy one. 16 units, and very soon I should be working full time again at work. Whew! Wish me lots of luck! Next quarter I am supposed to start an internship, and I am not too sure of how I will do that with working and Kyleigh. I know I have to do it, and I have to do it very well, but I also have to make money to support Kyleigh and myself. I have faith it will all work out how it is supposed to, because it always does.

That's all for now, I hope everyone is doing well.

Taking back the wheel.

I have really started to feel like my strong, independent, old-self lately. I feel like I can face the world and still be standing when I am done. I have started drawing clear boundaries in my life and I really am so proud of myself for it. I like that I feel strong enough again to be able to say "I want ..." or "I need ..." and I won't deal with anything less than what I am asking for. I am not going to allow myself to be pushed around by others anymore, and I have actually already started to put that into action rather than just saying it. I am so glad. I am doing what I want with my life regardless of what others have to say about it. I am no longer allowing people to impose their guilt or opinions onto me.

This is MY life.

 I am the one who has to deal with the repercussions of my choices, so why not make my decisions based on what I desire rather than what others think is best? Can you even begin to understand how liberating that feels to say?? I am going to do what I want! Not out of anger, or sadness, or guilt, but out of pure desire and happiness! Amazing.